Poly Weekly #170: Loving More with Robyn Trask

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KATRINA. A lot of people right now are beginning to see a shift in the definition of what it means to be in a relationship, and that definition is no longer contingent upon monogamy. The concept of polyamory is nothing new, of course, but the concept of serious, loving, and functioning relationships that are also sexually open sometimes seems to be. Straying from that is like falling down a slippery societal slope which eventually leads to women getting the right to vote and gays wanting to get married. Sex does matter to us. For lots of relationships that go that way and eventually end, having a more open relationship seems like an easy way to slowly let go while weirdly simultaneously hold on.

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But when the group leader asked me if I wanted to hang out sometime, I knew that I did. So I said yes. He already had three girlfriends. After cheating on me just weeks after we'd lost our virginity to each other, he apologised with tears and gifts and proclamations of true love. Soon after, he suggested that he continue to sleep with other people - and that I do the same.